Some FAQs

I'm finally getting around to answering these "Ask me anything" questions, and some of these were a little deeper than I was expecting but I'll do my best to answer them, and perhaps this will become the start of a new FAQ page.

1. What are your plans for #2?
I'm not sure when #2 will show up. Hopefully sometime next year. I have to live up to my name.

2. Do you feel you're too young to make any "permanent decisions" about the total number of kids you'll have?
Oh yes. As of now I'd like at least three kids but I know my mind changes a lot so ask me again in a year.

3. As of right now, how long do you plan to breast feed?
I'd like to breastfeed for a year. She still hasn't needed to supplement and now that we've made it to solids I think we'll make it to a year without needing formula. I don't see myself extending breastfeeding past a year though.

4. Do you and hub go on regular dates?
No. Isn't that sad? We've been on one solo date since Lil' J was born. I said we would make it regular but we have yet to find a babysitter, and feel bad asking friends. We're going to work on that this year.

5. Do you wish you had waited longer to TTC (and have baby J)...or do you wish you had done it sooner?
Oh man. Many times I wonder what I was so scared of and why I waited so long. Sometimes I do get frustrated with the time I have to spend away from her at work, and I wonder if I had waited until I had developed a career at home if it would have been better for us, but who knows when or if that will ever happen. I think she came at the perfect time and everything will work out.

6. How has baby J impacted your relationship as husband & wife?
I thought I'd be so jealous of their father/daughter relationship, and sometimes I am, but really the bond I have with her is so much stronger than I imagined. Because of this I think sometimes I tend to ignore my husband and not spend as much time connecting with just him. We both like spending time together as the three of us, but having a baby does change the dynamic of the husband/wife relationship. In some ways we are closer than ever, but I think we've grown more as a family than as a couple, and I want to work on that.

7. Do you get a lot of people who look at you funny because you obviously don't look exactly like your daughter? Does that bother you? How do you handle it?
I do get people who assume she's not mine, or give me a surprised look when I say she's mine, but I think some of her features are starting to look more like me, so it's becoming less common. It does bother me a little but I also have to laugh a little too. Oh, I also sometimes try to match her when we go out. It may be a little dorkie but I figure people assume we're related if we dress alike.

8. What is your dream job?
It used to be to be a reporter for the #1 news station in Atlanta but that's changed since having my daughter. As far as work goes I think I have the best job I could possibly have outside of the home for me. If I could take over for Oprah, it would be pretty awesome but other than that, I can't imagine it getting much better than this. Unless I was working from home, writing books, flying to NYC for occasional spots on the Today Show, and contributing for major parenting magazines. Ever heard of Denene Millner? I want to be her.

9. You refer sometimes to the LDS church, and I see that you are an active member. From a first-hand perspective what drew you to the church? Were you brought up LDS or did you convert? How would you say it affects your daily life choices...as in, do you ever wish that you could do things that are 'forbidden' by the church? And based on your experience, how do you intend to bring up Lil' J with regards to your faith?
My family joined and became active in the LDS church when I was about 11 years old. So I was somewhat brought up in the church, but by the time I hit my teenage years I was deciding to go for myself. There was something about the way I felt when I went, that even from a young age I was asking my family when we'd be going back.

I was drawn to the church by the strong message of family, the way I felt when I went, and how the people around me seemed to be so loving and genuine. My beliefs aren't just a religion to me it's really my lifestyle and it makes me so happy. The message of the LDS church is so positive, and uplifting, and about always striving to better yourself, which I think is important.

As far as things that are "forbidden," it's not much different than how my parents raised me. My parents never drank, smoked, or drank coffee. My mom always wore moddest clothing and never swore, even before we joined the LDS church. So none of these things have ever really been difficult for me to adjust to. It is weird when people act very shocked when they hear I don't drink. I don't think it's so weird.

I hope to raise my daughter the same way, with strong values.

10. Was it easy to lose the babyweight?
Yes and no. I haven't been weighing myself but I'm sure I'm not back down to my pre-baby weight. I also haven't been doing anything to loose it besides yoga once a week and about 15 minutes of cardio three or four nights a week (which I'm not sure if that even helps since you're suppose to do cardio for something like 30 minutes before you start burning fat). Breastfeeding I hear helps but it's not doing me as much good as I was hoping. I hear sometimes the last bit of fat your body doesn't shed off until you wean because it's got that "on reserve" for the baby.

11. How has your feelings about your body changed since giving birth?
I feel a lot more insecure. I'm not used to carrying extra weight around in places I didn't have it before. I'm trying to adjust and motivate myself to get back into shape.

12. Which baby gear do you use most often? More than you expected? Less than you expected? could you totally do without?
Without a doubt I use my wraps more than anything else. I have a Sugar Sweet Baby and a Moby. I use them WAY more than I expected. I thought I'd get annoyed carrying my baby around all of the time but I actually enjoy it and it's easier than holding her. I hardly ever use my stroller. I bought a swing and while she loved it for a few weeks it's in the corner now. I'd say other than that a pump was necessary, and now we're having fun with bath toys :) I think a lot of it depends on the baby though. Definitely don't buy it all new. You can get most of the stuff second hand for a fraction of the price and not feel bad if your baby doesn't like it.

13. I know that you had cankles, and I am wondering what you did to help relieve the swelling? By the end of the day my feet hurt and are very puffy.
I used compression hose and put my feet up when I got home at night. That helped a lot. Also drinking lots of water and cutting back on salt. I bought some lotion that was suppose to help with the swelling and I don't think it did much for it, but it was nice to say it helped and get my husband to rub my feet every night! 

13. I second the Mormon question! I'm really interested to know how big of an impact that plays in your life, marriage, parenting etc.? I'm about to sound dumb and I'm okay with that but.... don't they outwardly discourage interracial relationships? If so, how can you just ignore such an important aspect of the faith in your life? How will you address that with your daughter? The LDS church doesn't discourage interracial relationships. It's possible some people do but that happens in any religion. I remember someone in high school saying they weren't allowed to date outside of their race "because it's in the Bible." In my "preparation for marriage" class at BYU there was one line in a manual that says something to the effect of marrying someone from a starkly different social background may add stress to the marriage. Some people interpret that differently but it's definitely not frowned upon.

With my daughter, I'll teach her to love a man for who he is, not what he looks like, and if anyone--At church, at her school, anywhere, tries to tell her differently I'll be sure to correct them.

14. What about the clothes? Don't you have to wear certain undergarments all. the. time? I'm sure there are some aspects of the faith that are antiquated and outmoded, but then again, I could be wrong? I'm fascinated by all faiths and forms of spirituality and would love an in-depth look at LDS through your eyes.
I wear modest clothing long enough to be about down to my knees and shirts that cover my shoulders and don't swoop too low.

I didn't realize so many people had questions about my religion. For more information and people who can probably answer better than I can feel free to visit Mormon.org.

13. I am dealing with infertility and would love your advice.I'm so sorry for the challenge you're going through. Personally I haven't had to face infertility so I can't offer much advice in that department. I know there are many online resources to help. I used a program called Circle and Bloom which is aimed to help people going through infertility. But perhaps an infertility blogger like Naomi may have better at advice.

14. Where on Earth do you find time to blog, Twitter, Facebook, and do all the other social networking stuff that you do? How do you do it ALL???How do I do it all? Well, I don't! I get a lot of help from my husband. My house is a wreck 95% of the time. I blog when everyone is asleep, I tweet while I'm waiting in line, waiting at red lights, breastfeeding, or going to the bathroom. I usually get the urge to write once or twice a week and I try to jot down my thoughts while I'm in the mood or I forget it. If I can't get on my laptop, I'll type it on my phone, or even voice-memo myself with phrases or ideas I'm thinking of then type it all up later and save them in my drafts to post throughout the week.

15. Tell me about your hair. What is your regimen? (Do you go to the salon or do it yourself?) Do you have a relaxer? Do you wear a weave or is it all yours? Have you always had THAT much hair? It's beautiful!
Thank you so much! I'm embarrassed to say this but I don't have a hair regimen. I wish I did. If I'm lucky I wrap it at night, or put it in rollers but mostly I put it up in a bun, sleep on it and brush/curl it before work. I go to the salon every 3-4 weeks and get it washed, blown dry and flat ironed. I don't wash it in between. I've never had a relaxer or color, and it is all my hair, haha. I did have braids one summer, and wore half weave of a lighter brown color when I wanted a "highlights" look.

Yes, I have always had "THAT much hair" but my sisters don't, so I'm not exactly sure how it got this way. I can already tell my daughter is going to have a head full too. Yikes!

365 Love Letters Week 4

I text messaged my mom this week making sure I had the phrase right in my latest love letter. "Kill them with kindness," like I tell Lil' J is something my mom taught me when I was younger. She said it's the best way to get back at someone who is being mean to you, and she wasn't lying.

This isn't to be confused with passive aggressiveness. That's when you beat around the bush and don't directly let the person know what you're trying to say. Killing with kindness is when you are overly nice to someone, even when they're being blatantly mean. It will either make them feel bad, or annoy the crap out of them. Take this for example...

You're driving down the road. You switch lanes and accidentally cut someone off. The wacko behind you now starts honking, speeds past you flipping you off and swearing out his window. You could yell back or ignore him but what's even better is when you act like you don't know he's mad and wave. Just look at him, give him a huge smile and wave ecstatically like he's a friend from school you haven't seen in ages. He'll probably get really confused and speed off to put their road rage on someone else. I think the picture I captured of Lil' J today to go with this message is perfect!

My mom couldn't believe I remembered her advice after all these years, she hardly remembered telling me. But it resonated with me, and I use this technique to this day. Besides, I've never been good at witty comebacks or cussing people out.

Remembering this advice from my mom made me even more excited to be making these little memos for my daughter. Hopefully we can both look back and smile at these little tokens I'm sharing with her. I've got almost one month down, 11 to go! Also, on Day 24 she got her first tooth, and on day 28 she got another! I figured I wouldn't take another tooth picture in the same week though, plus, it's hard to capture!

So here's week 4:

What would you do for more blog followers?

Pay cash money? That's what about 300 bloggers are doing and it made me think about this whole blogging, follower, money making phenomenon. As my girl @whodemis on Twitter says "I can't knock the hustle" and I have to agree because let me admit... This idea was GENIUS.

1. Create an email account connected to business name for advertising.

2. Create a linky for bloggers who want more followers. Make the requirement $10 to be entered on to the linky (it's a business write off).

3. Use money from the first 100 links to set up a raffle, instruct visitors to follow the blogs then comment for each follow to be entered to win $1000.

Initially when I saw it I thought the $10 tax write off was because the money was going to charity. Sweet right? Not exactly. The host, and advertiser for the blogs on the linky pockets the proceeds. Really it's a win win win. She gets to make $2K... or whatever else over the initial $1000, which she's already done. Blogs who want more followers get them, and one lucky follower gets $1000.

Now I could go on a rant about how we need more engineers in this country, people who study, develop new inventions, businesses, and jobs for more people---That "get rich quick" schemes like this are ultimately showing we as a people falling short of the big picture, but I won't go into that. Instead, what I want to focus on is this idea of blog followers.

Why do we have them? Well, Cindy hit the nail on the head with her post about the blogging bubble. When I begged my friends to be my first 7, 100, I'll admit, the number big and bright to the right had me gloating. It was my stamp of "coolness" if you will. A way to obviously show people read me and say "I'm kind of a big deal." No but really, it felt good to know people were reading me. And there's nothing wrong with that. Until it turns into an obsession.

I did some giveaways just for my followers, to gain more followers, and in turn used that number to get better giveaways and even more followers. I know it sounds dirty, I'm just being honest.

Sometime over the last year this craze with that number BLEW UP! I mean, huge in the blogosphere! There were linkies like "Follow me Friday" "More Followers Monday" "Pretty Please Follow Me Wednesday" (ok I made the last one up). And I'll admit, I tried a couple but then realized there was no way I'd be able to read all of these new blogs in my reader, and I felt a bit... Dare I say... desperate. Sure, I'd find a couple gems in the bunch but really? Comeon, let's me honest, we all just wanted to boost our stats. Even if that number has become so diluted, and really null and void at this point because everyone now has a few a hundred dozen fake followers.

But then I would write a post like this one, and gain two dozen followers in a day or two. Seeing the number rising corresponding with a post I wrote from the heart meant so much more to me than a random follower who when you click on their name, it takes you to a profile with nothing more than an email address to contact them if they won, and a list of a thousand other blogs they followed for the giveaways--aka a giveaway hoarder.

So this year I made a resolution to tone it down with the reviews. Mostly accept mom-owned products to make things more personal, and force me to be less commercial. Following was optional to enter giveaways but still a common entry for many people.

But somewhere between doing my own giveaways for followers, dogging this small sortof pyramid scheme on twitter, and then getting called a hypocrite (hey, I can admit it, it's hypocritical) I was forced to ask myself: Why does that number to the right matter? My blog isn't my job. I don't need stats to make money or provide for my family. it's a place for me to release, vent, and rant about things like this. So why does it matter?

If a company is interested in working with me, do I want them to contact me because of a number they see when they visit my blog, or write to me because of the content the read? My guess is before, some were just looking at the number. Which may be one reason I recently got an email from a PR rep which started "Hi Amanda..." when my name is actually not Amanda.

So, now realizing that that number was good for nothing, other that to occasionally stroke my ego as it would go up, or make me feel bad when I noticed it go down, or possibly make others feel bad if theirs wasn't as high, I've decided to escape the circus and simply remove it indefinitely. At least until I regain my reigns.

If people still follow blogs and read them in their reader the old fashioned way (or is it the new-aged way?) they can subscribe my blog via reader by clicking the reader button under my "about" section, or just get my email subscription or just do the for realz old fashioned way and use my RSS feed subscription thingy.

I have to admit, this takes a slight leap of faith. My blog has brought me tremendous opportunities. I've fallen into writing gigs, side jobs, and even recently was contacted by a network news station about my love letters. I don't know if that was because of that number to the right, or because of me.

Going forward, I guess I will.

*Update* It's come to my attention that 1. That blog taking money for the raffle has disappeared, which may very well have confirm my suspicions of a scam. And 2. I have many readers who read my blog who found me through a giveaway but stayed for my content... Who knew? Thanks all yall, really, thank you everyone who reads. Sorry for my rant on this subject, I just was getting annoyed of being thrown into the same pot as many bloggers who only do giveaways. There's nothing wrong with that, but that's not what I want to be known for, or as.

Work/Home Balance--Is There Such a Thing?

I've officially been at work, away from my daughter longer than I was at home with her during my maternity leave. I'd be lying if I were to say it's gotten much easier.

Every morning when I have to kiss her goodbye, it's still ridiculously hard. It breaks my heart even more now when she knows I'm grabbing my purse--not our diaper bag--and I'm leaving without her.

I try my best now to leave when she's distracted or still sleeping; because when she's awake and aware she'll hold her arms out for me and cry.

Daily I'm submerged in feelings of guilt for not being there for her, and paranoia about missing a first. Missing her crawl for the first time, the first time she says "mama" or just being there for her daily developments.

I can't say how grateful I am though for the fact that she's with the best caregiver in the world. Seeing her with her dad, and how close they've gotten makes my heart melt. When I come home she practically jumps into my arms and is all smiles. She's so happy when we're all home and close together and it makes me so grateful she has two parents who love each other and love her. Sadly, that's not the case for everyone. But I'm still a little jealous of that bond I see they have, and of the time he gets with her.

On my day off this week, Little J and I went out for yoga, then we went to lunch and shopping with a friend. She was by my side or in her carrier that entire day and I had the most amazing time. I would be standing in an isle at a craft store and notice her look up at me from her wrap and smile. I'd lean over to kiss her nose and she'd laugh. The simplest moment made me want to stop time and stay right there with her forever. I wished I could I had more moments like these. Like I was missing moments like these every day I leave her for the grind.

We started the daycare search this week and it's been exhausting. It's so hard looking for someone to care for my daughter aside from my husband and I, and trusting them with her. Luckily, we won't need to enroll her for another six or seven months, which by then I think she'll be ready to learn and ready for interaction with other kids her age, but it's still so hard.

Right now I can call home and video chat with her via iPhone. At first she didn't know what to think of it, and she'd grab my husband's phone, reaching for me, then she'd start crying when she realized I couldn't pick her up. Now she'll usually smile and talk to me for a little bit, still try to grab the phone, but I think she's realized iPhones don't have arms. This is just one of the experiences I'll miss once she starts daycare. That, and visiting home during my lunch break with a ready-made lunch and grinning baby ready to play.

I started my search by asking a friend I work with her recommendations. She recently did a series on childcare and had some great links to share with me about searching for accredited programs. I started there.

I found one that is close to my job--less than a mile away--and scheduled a tour. When I walked in worked to hold back tears. It's wasn't the facility or what I saw that made me feel bad but the thought of her being in daycare.

I looked in the infant room even though she will be over a year once she starts, but paid most attention to the sunbeam room, for 12-18 month olds since that's where she'd be. They had a glider chair for nursing moms who want to drop in and feed their baby. That made me feel good, even though I'm not sure I'll nurse her past a year. They also allow cloth diapers, which is a big plus, and the biggest positive is how close it is to my job. But the room was so small. Like insanely small. I worked in daycare for years and was worked in rooms four times as big for half as many one-year-olds. That was a huge setback, and almost enough for me to cross them off my list.

I have started looking for other schools but I'm trying not to let the glitz and glam overshadow the accreditation which is really one of my top priorities right now. That and proximity. But there's a huge shortage of them between my house and my job, and because of this, ones that are close--at least the good ones--are extremely expensive.

I'm hoping to just enroll her part time since I work Wednesday through Sunday, I'll still have Mondays and Tuesdays off to spend with her, and her dad will still be with her on the weekends for the most part. Our situation could be so much worse but sometimes I wish I could see what it's like in another's shoes.

Even after my husband begins his new job, I can't imagine leaving mine. I'm not used to not working, not bringing in some kind of income, and feeling like I can support myself if need be. But oh it would be so nice to spend afternoons at play dates, and weekends at birthday parties. It would be nice to feel like a full time mom, submerge myself into cooking literature, sewing her dresses, making her bows, and perfect a new, domesticated me. But then I'd feel guilty every time I bought something. And fun outings I like to do now on my days off would be limited to free things--Yoga would be out. And everything that makes me ME as I know myself would be different. Everything I've worked toward almost my entire life would be put on hold indefinitely to pursue a much less lucrative, but more rewarding full-time career.

I love my job, love my career, what I do every day, and I'm happier than I've even been at work, but my heart and passion gets left at home with my little girl.

It's hard finding a balance. I'm not sure I ever will.

10 Tips for flying with a baby

If there's one thing I think I've mastered in motherhood, it's flying with an infant. Granted, it's different every time, especially since she's getting older and more active/nosey/hard to tame but I've still had nine flights with her in her six months of life, and yes, I finally set up a frequent flyer account (no, my daughter can't have one yet).

My first flight with my daughter was when she was about two and a half weeks old. I know some people say you shouldn't travel with babies that young but I was exclusively breastfeeding and kept her wrapped up around me, plus our pediatrician gave us the O-K so we went for it and flew to Utah. My mother in law flew with us and it helped a lot having an extra set of arms.

Our second flight was back home when she was about a month old, and my husband flew home with us, again making traveling relatively simple. Then a week later Lil' J and I flew to New York City for the Blogher conference. That was our first of seven flights alone together after the first two with help.

I've had several people write to me asking tips for traveling with a baby so I thought I'd write some of the things I've learned in a post, so someone else can hopefully find these things helpful.

1. Pack light. I know this is hard, and pretty impossible with a baby because you need so much. Diapers, blankets, burp cloths, PJs, clothes. But try your best to keep it to a minimum. On one of my trips, to my mom's house, we decided to pack a few diapers but buy more there. Along with baby soap, and small sizes of things I could use while I was visiting. If your family is anything like mine, you'll most likely be bringing more stuff home from your trip, so leave extra room in your suitcase if you can.

2. Only bring one carry-on. Yes, you're entitled to one carry on and one extra bag or purse but I was sure to make it easy on myself and only carry on her diaper bag. One time my check in bag was over 50 pounds so I took my camera out to carry it on with me and forgot it on the plane when we got off. Luckily I realized this once I got to baggage claim and was able to ask the Delta people to page up there and have someone bring it down to me. An extra bag with a baby can be a lot to remember.

3. Wear your baby. This would be ranked number one in my books of things that make traveling with a baby easier. On 9/9 flights with my daughter I wore her in a wrap through the entire boarding process and most of the flight. On our most recent flight we were waiting in the airport for hours, and she just hung out in our Moby Wrap. I thought having a stroller would be a necessity but I'd argue that would only make things more difficult.

In the first few months of my daughter's life she fell asleep moments after being snuggled in my wrap. She was out like a light while we walked through the airport, went through security and everything. These last couple of flights she wanted to face forward (like pictured above) and watch everything, and she was too excited to fall asleep, but it was still an easy way to have my hands free while going through the boarding process.

Will you need to take them out through security? Yes and no. I only was asked to take her out of my wrap once out of our nine flights, and they made me take my wrap off too, which was super annoying. It was our most recent flight though, and they had recently upped security measures. On our flight before that, to Salt Lake we were given the option to take her out of her wrap while we walked through the metal detector or have a pat down. At first I was like "give me a pat down" but then I realized it wasn't hard to pull her out for a second and put her back in. So total I took her out twice.

4. Look for signs that help you. In most of the airports we've been to there are separate lines for families through security checkout, so you can bypass the long wait. If you're flying with a child under two they not only get to fly for free, but you get to get on the plane first (or right after first class, depending on the carrier).

5. Don't put booties or shoes on your baby. At least not through security, unless you don't mind taking them off, but it's just an extra step they make you go through. Socks are ok, so I make sure she was wearing her Trumpettes on the rest of the flights after this happened.

6. Dress easy. Meaning don't wear a belt you'll have to take off at security, or shoes you'll have to untie and tie again, or a big coat that will get in the way... You get the idea. If you're flying alone with a baby these things that are normally simple to do are a HUGE PAIN!

7. Nurse, feed your baby or let him or her suck on something during takeoff and landing. But don't freak out about it if they're sleeping. You know how you yawn, chew gum, or swallow to pop your ears during the elevation changes? Same concept. Lil' J was asleep during our first six flights however, so I let her sleep, and she didn't seem to be affected. If she was awake, I nursed her, and she did ok with the pressure changes.

8. Do your best to get a window seat. We've been lucky enough to have one on all of our flights and it makes breastfeeding on the plane so much easier as I can just turn towards the window and no one knows the wiser.

Before our 9th flight back home

9. If you're nursing and/or pumping during your trip don't worry. You're allowed to bring the milk on the plane for your baby. Just tell security about the milk for the baby, and if necessary, they'll take it aside to screen it. They didn't even do that with me. On one of my trips I had about 70 ounces I was bringing back, so I bought a pound of dry ice to keep it frozen, and put it all in a cooler in my checked bag. On other flights with smaller amounts I kept it in my carry-on. Also, a breast pump is considered a "medical device" so you can bring it on the plane with your other two bags, or check it for free. *Car seats, strollers, pack n' plays and other baby stuff are also free to check*

10. Track your flight before you get to the airport. Lil' J and I missed a flight that was actually on time when we arrived just minutes after they cut off the check in time (45 minutes before your flight takes off). It SUCKED! But luckily we were able to catch the next one for a minimal fee. After that, I was sure to be prompt or very early to our flights. But it wasn't until after checking into our last flight (and having already returned my rental car) that I realized our flight was TWO HOURS delayed. I wasn't happy. And it's not fun sitting at an airport just waiting with a baby. Luckily I had my camera with me, and some toys for her, so we were able to keep entertained, but this could have been avoided had I checked the flight tracker beforehand.

So there are ten tips that will hopefully help you on a trip with your little one. Let me know if I left anything off or if there's something else you're wondering.

To help make your next trip with your baby much easier, everyone who comments on this post before February 1st will be entered to win an original Moby Wrap of their choice. You can get ONE extra entry by thanking Moby Wrap for this giveaway on facebook or twitter OR if you're a one of my "homies" (top right). Winner will be announced on my facebook page.

365 Love Letters Week 3

What you should never say to your wife (Unless you wanna die)...

Men, don't say this to your wife. Especially when she's 6 months postpartum.

"Honey--" as you grab the blubber left on her belly. Her sweet baby 'phat' "--Are you sure you're not pregnant?"

And after your wife gives you a look that could kill you, please, don't tempt her to do the real thing by backpedaling off a cliff--

"I mean, maybe just a couple of months?"

Now my question... Who's going to bail me out of jail?

Baby Food Making 101: I Freaking Did it!

sI’ve already cooked more these first three weeks of the year than I did all last year combined.

Before this week I had never bought a squash or a pot roast before. But I bought and made both last night.

This is a big accomplishment for me. HUGE. I am conquering my fear of the kitchen.

How?

Well, a few ways. For one, I dusted off a fabulous wedding gift--My crock-pot--And put it to use.

I also owe part of my thanks to my iPhone. I downloaded the All Recipies app so I could have all of my recipes on my phone with shopping lists etc etc, plus get ideas because I’m not one of those people who can just look in my cabinet and know what it can make (but last I checked there weren’t recipes including Cheetos, Twizzlers, cereal and rice anyway).

The extremely daunting part of cooking for me is finding the ingredients at the store, so I emailed screen shots of the shopping list to my husband (who now also has an iPhone) so he could grocery shop with our daughter while I was at work, and I could cook it in my crock pot the next morning. This was how I cooked last week. I made chicken, and beef stew.

One thing he couldn’t find on the list was the top sirloin pot roast, so I looked for it at the store a couple of days ago. I had to phone a friend (aka my mother in law), to figure out which kind I wanted and decided on the rump roast.

Then I headed over to the produce isle. I wanted to buy a squash because my daughter loves the NuturMe squash I bought plus I just got this in the mail, and my friend gave me this book as a baby shower gift, so I wanted to try to make baby food myself dangit!

I didn’t see an organic option for squash so I went with the non-organic in hopes that it’s not so bad. Organic baby food or homemade puree? I’m not sure which is better. I'm hoping the latter since I'm going through all of this effort!

Did you know squash is a dang big vegetable? I didn’t. Each looked like they could feed her for a year. It was a dollar something a pound and the small one I picked was nearly three pounds so it cost us about four bucks. It had better last awhile. I thought to myself as we rang it all up.

After putting the pot roast dinner in the crock-pot and getting Lil’ J down for a nap I got to work on her squash. The directions that came with my baby food processer recommend making 1/3 the squash, so I chopped up a third of it, realized I need to peel it too, so I chopped the ends off. Then I put it in the processor, pushed the steam and blend button and let it do the rest of the work. But what do I do with the rest of the squash?

I was going to wrap it in foil and stick it in the fridge but then I realized it would probably save me a lot of time if I just made it all at the same time (am I smart or what?). I posed the question on twitter and got several ideas for how to cook the rest. One mom suggested an easy oven steam recipe.

I cut the squash in half long ways (and discovered a pumpkin-looking inside, who knew?!) scooped the seeds out, then placed it in a glass pan and filled it with water (I flipped it over after this picture).

Put it in the over at 400 degrees for 40 minutes.

When it came out it was super soft. For about 2/3 of it I scooped it out and pureed it, and put it in ice cube trays to freeze for later (I've heard you can reheat it easily by warming it with water, breastmilk or just in the microwave). 

The other 3rd I sliced up, peeled off the skin, and set it aside for dinnertime and future meals where she may want to feed herself or what many people call "baby lead weaning" but I just call "feed your dang self."

I mentioned before trying a bit of this method as well as and purees, and tonight I let her eat the squash I had steamed and cut while we ate pot roast. She seems to like it (and broccoli we were eating). She sits on the table for now cause she doesn't have a high chair yet but I'm thinking of getting one of these space saver chairs for her from CSN.

And me? I feel like a Domestic Goddess! (Remember, I made pot roast too... I'm seriously on a roll).

I just bought my first sweet potato and I'm going to go at it again!

{Almost} Wordess Wednesday: A Smile to Brighten My Day

Little Splendid dresses c/o Target

After a week of rain, the sun finally came out. I had a day off and we were itching to get outside and play. It was mid-60s outside so I combed my daughter's curly hair, dolled her up in her new pink and blue and grabbed my camera.

It used to be easy to capture her big grin. I used to be the center of her universe. Now when we're out of the house, she finds so many other things more interesting than me and my silly faces.

It's bittersweet to see her grow and discover. Time is going by much too fast.

Between grabbing mud out of her hands stretching towards her mouth (and sometimes stopping her a second too late) I captured a smile in my direction. And I fell in love all over again.

Thank you for reading my blog. Thank you even more for your many words of encouragement. I appreciate you, and for that I try to give back. So everyone who comments on this post by midnight next Wednesday the 26th, will be entered to win a $50 Target gift card which you can use towards Target's adorable Little Splendid clothing bundles now available in stores. Followers or subscribers can have an extra entry. Winner announced next week on my Facebook Page.

*This post is sponsored by BabyCenter in conjunction with the BabyCenter Blog Network.

Pumping Party: Tips for Lacating Mamas

Every day I head to work with my mom equivalent of a leather briefcase -- My pump bag. As a working mother who has been so paranoid about not having enough milk to feed my daughter, I get it. I get how stressful it can be. But I've successfully breastfed for more than six months and still haven't had to break into the free can of formula Enfamil sent me when she was born. That's right, we haven't had to supplement a drop! And to be honest I'm shocked.

It hasn't been easy, but I've learned a few things as I've gone along that may be helpful to others.

About Storing
1. Start early: If you're going back to work I can't stress enough how important it was for me to have a stash built up. It doesn't have to be huge, but just something for emergencies, and to help you feel confidant about going back to work and pumping. I started pumping when my daughter was about three weeks old.

2. Get to know your pump. Another reason to start early is so you can get used to your pump. Get to know how to put it together, take it apart, clean it. And the more you use it, the more your body will get used to how it works and the better it will respond to it. The first few times I pumped I only got a couple of ounces, but I got more and more as time went on.

3. Pump with the baby. If you're like me and feel like your baby is attached to you 24/7 you may wonder when you can even get the chance to pump. One thing I did was hook up the pump to one side, and pump with her on the other side. Your body naturally responds to your baby nursing so you'll probably get more milk this way. I do! This was much easier when she was smaller and less wiggly, but I still manage to do this during my lunch breaks with a pumping bra. When I was still on maternity leave I would nurse her from one side all night then pump the other side while she nursed in the morning and I'd get 6-7 ounces from that one side she didn't eat from all night.

4. Get good storage bags. I've used everything from Ziploc bags to storage containers and it makes a big difference when you use storage bags made for storing frozen breastmilk. I used Lansinoh for awhile, but the first time I took one out to defrost I realized there was a leak and I lost about 6oz of milk. So I tried some Simplisse ones and ended up liking those a little more and now I buy those (they're all the same price).

About Pumps
5. Get an electric. I have two pumps. One double electric breast pump by Avent, and a manual pump by Simplisse. I can't compare a manual to an electric to each other because it's like comparing apples to oranges. Actually, they're not even in the same fruit platter. I'd heard a manual was good to have for emergencies and it did call for an emergency for me to use mine. I was taking a quick trip and couldn't fit my electric in my bag.

I brought my manual which it's good I did but boy was I not prepared for the difference.

First off, I didn't realize manual was so much manual labor. My electric pump has a manual setting on it and you tap your finger and it goes to the speed of your tapping. My manual pump takes more effort.

It goes something like this:

First minute

After five minutes

After 10 minutes

After 15 minutes

Where as with an electric (and hands-free pumping bra) it's more like this:

Maybe my forearms are just really weak but it was a task. I was wondering why the bottle that came with it was so small but after 10 minutes of trying to pump I realized why--I wouldn't be able to pump very long.

The positive is it doesn't tug as much as my electric does, it was more comfortable, but I didn't get nearly as much milk out as I do with my electric. It saved me from exploding, but it wasn't the most effective. There are times though, in the middle of the night I consider manually pumping to build my supply back up. I never do it. But I think about it. Simplisse sent me the manual pump to try out, and it's comfortable, but not for my arms. Good news is, they have a double electric out now so that should solve that problem for anyone considering it.

I have a friend though who only used a manual pump, so some people do it! I think it's all about getting your body used to whatever pump you're using, like I mention in #2.

About Pumping at Work
6. Find time. I didn't think I'd have time to pump once a day, much less twice during my shift at work, but it's worth it when I do. I don't have a desk job, so I don't really have a set schedule for when I can pump, but it's nice if you can. Your body knows when it's "meal time" and usually produces more then. I did get into a routine where I was able to pump around 4pm every day and my supply would be larger and larger at that time. If I missed it, and pumped an hour later (or earlier), sometimes it would seem as though my supply was less. I'm not sure why or if maybe I'm just crazy.

Now I pump once in the middle of my shift, and once when I'm leaving and about to go home. By law in most states you're allowed time to pump so don't feel bad about it.

7. Find a place to pump with a door that locks. Oh my goodness, I about have a heart attack every singly day when I'm pumping because it never fails someone tries to walk in. Luckily the door is always locked, but I still have a half a second where my mind wonders if I forgot to lock it and this would be the time our traffic guy walks in, startled to see my girls tied up in tubes. It hasn't happened yet *knock on wood*.

8. Bring pictures of your baby, or a smart phone. I hook up to my pump and call home to talk to Lil' J, my husband, or play Angry Birds on my iPhone. Sometimes I bring my laptop in and try to do some work but I find I get more milk if I'm more relaxed. Sit back and enjoy the quiet time alone (Cause Lawd knows we don't get it often).

9. Here's a trick for storing your pump. I didn't know this until recently, but if you're going to pump multiple times while at work, you can put your pump (the horn parts, not the whole machine) in the fridge between sessions so you don't have to wash it each time. The milk on the pump stays fresh and doesn't need to be washed off. After I finally remembered to bring a bag to put them in (I didn't want to set my pump conspicuously next to a coworkers chicken salad) I started doing this and it takes about 5 minutes off each of my pumping sessions.

(I just remembered one more!) 10. Pump for 15 minutes!! If you're double pumping I mean. I usually want to give up and pack up after 10 minutes but those last five minutes really pay off. I usually can get an extra ounce or two from an extra let down before I go. It's worth it hanging on just a little longer every session.

Well, those are all of the tips I can think of right now. If you're looking for something for supply I'd recommend fenugreek, an herb that's suppose to help with milk production. I use Mother's Milk Drops by Intelligender. Their prediction test was wrong but these drops sure are right when it comes to helping. I normally get an extra ounce or two after taking (twice the dosage--But don't do that just cause I do, I'm crazy) of those drops.

Hopefully this can help some working mamas, or perspective pumpers out.

(congrats children teaching mama #36!!)

Every GFC Follower who comments on this post Before the 22nd will be entered to win a pack of goodies from Simplisse including: A Manual Breastfeeding Companion designed by lactation consultants, Essential Lactation Supplements, Disposable Breast Pads, Lanolin-Free Nipple Cream and Breastmilk Storage Bags (ARV $100). You can get an extra entry by thanking Simplisse for this giveaway on their Facebook page.

My friend Jessica is having a huge blog hop for giveaways, all over $50 (many over $100) so if you're feeling lucky, enter these below. Have fun!

My Photography FAQs

Lately I've been getting a lot of emails and comments lately from people asking what kind of camera I have, what lens I use, and what editing software I like so I thought I'd break it down and share my "secrets."

#1. Get a cute baby. Don't have one? Steal one. It's easy! This one below actually came from me, but any baby or dog, or subject will do.

#2. Turn off the flash! I used to love the flash. Now I hate it. Unless you have an expensive flash for your camera, don't use it. Pictures are much prettier without it, I promise!

#3. Use sunlight, but not too much. Sit in the shade if you're photographing outside, overcast days are best!

#4. Buy photoshop. This isn't a requirement, but it really helped my photos.

#5. Hunt for photoshop actions. Photoshop was useless to me before I discovered premade actions for it, but that could be cause I'm an idiot... Dunno.

So, I'm not a professional photographer by any means, and I just enjoy taking photos of my daughter, but all of my holiday money has gone to editing stuff lately and I must say they've improved my photos a lot!

I like taking pictures and I always try to use natural light when possible. But sometimes there just isn't light available, so I have to get creative, or tweak things in afterward. I'm also more of a computer person anyway, and don't know much about changing the settings on my camera (yet) so I enjoy sprucing up a photo in after effects.

My friend Danielle has been my personal shopper when it comes to camera stuff. She buys it and tries it, and I copy her and get the same thing. We're both learning photographers (though she's learning faster and actually good, and I'm just a fanatic mom obsessed with photographing my daughter).

What do I have? I use a Canon Rebel XSi, which I got for Christmas/Birthday/ My Anniversary two years ago. Then as my push present I got a 50mm portrait lens, which made my pictures 100Xs better (though you can't be super close when you take the photo). I also take about 60% of my photos of her on my iPhone, which my new one actually takes pretty good pictures! I use FX PhotoStudio, and ArtStuido apps to edit some of my 365 love letters photos.

The next lens I'm thinking of getting (or I should say renting first) is the 85mm.


Recently, my friend told me about Paint the Moon Photography, and photoshop actions and when I saw what actions are I was like "What the--Holy heck, are you serious?!"

I had photoshop for years. I went in on CS3 with my sister in law and recently upgraded to CS4 when my computer freaked out. But I haven't known how to use it. I mean sure, I can add text to a photo, and rotate it, but that was about it. My expensive program was collecting dust.

With actions you basically press the "play" button and watch the magic happen. Then tweak the photos to your liking when it's done. (But again, remember I'm not professional, just taking these pictures to save and share with my family, so take that into account when you consider my use of the words "easy" and "awesome").

I wanted to make sure I knew what I was doing before going crazy and buying all of the action sets so I just bought the essentials for $35 to try it out. Here's some of the differences I noticed.

Then for Christmas I went crazy and bought more... The Picture Perfect Mega set, Coffee House, Miracle Makeover, and Texture Collection Two. It was a lot of money, but it was a Christmas gift for Heaven's sake!

I've even been able to fix up a lot of the photos I've taken on my iPhone. (These are some of the ones I've been sharing on her facebook page, so don't mind all of my extra text and descriptions on them.)

My next buys may be the Coffee House Bonus set, and probably Wonderland or Fresh.

People have also been telling me you can find free actions some places, so I've been on the hunt for those too, (and if you know of any, let me know!)

If you haven't a clue what you're doing you can check out her video tutorials on her blog, they're helpful.

So this mama (Annie--the owner who created these actions) has helped me discover a new hobby of mine and I'm having so much fun with it! I even snapped a few pictures for my friend who's having a baby in a few weeks so I could try it out on a new subject, and I've been excited about the results. I think I have enough jobs already and will leave the photography business to Tara, but this was fun!

And really, I'm not trying to sound like that OxiClean guy (RIP) in this post, I'm just loving these, and thinking another mama who likes to photograph her child can find some of the same joy I do in making them even prettier. 

Everyone who comments on this post before January 31st will be entered to win a $35 gift card for Paint the Moon actions (enough for a set or two). You can get an extra entry if you "like" Paint the Moon's Facebook Page, be nice and thank her for this giveaway while you're there! If you're a blog follower of mine you can get an extra entry too. I'll announce the winner on my facebook page.

365 Love Letters Week 2

Here's week two, and I still haven't missed a day. Several of these were taken on my iPhone, which made them easy to document. I'm posting them most recent up top so it's easy to post and go, and start a new post each week with my new photos. I haven't found a theme to them just yet. It's still just random thoughts, or messages of the day that come to mind, or I take the photo first and think of a sort of caption to go with it. I just noticed all of them this week have her in them. What can I say, she's my favorite photo subject.
I'm not sure what's up with the binky in day 14. I gave it too her and she started playing with it. All if a sudden it's a new fun toy.

Birthday Bliss

I had a fabulous birthday. I had to work but it didn't stop my family from giving me a day to remember.

From breakfast in bed, to presents, to phone calls, a dinner out, and birthday cheese cake, I loved it all.

I'm so blessed to have had such a wonderful life so far, and this last year has been truly amazing!

10 Things I'll do differently next time around

I often think about what I'll do differently with my next pregnancy/birth/child. Pregnancy was SO FUN. I really enjoyed it. Every bit, right down to my cankles. In fact, I was a little obsessed with my cankles. Still am.

I don't have any regrets, but there are some things I didn't do with Lil' J that I want to try next time. You know, new experiments to do with my next victim. So without further adieu, here's my growing list of "next time arounds."

1. Not tell anyone I'm pregnant until I'm extremely fat. Not even my husband (kidding... sorta). Actually, it would be cool if I didn't even know until I was really fat.
2. I'll get a 3D/4D Ultrasound. It's one thing I didn't do with Lil' J that I wish I had.
3. Whatever my due date is, I'm adding a week to it from the start and calling that my due date. I know no baby of mine is going to be early, so I might as well expect it to be at least a week late. That way when I'm a week late (really two weeks) it won't be so stressful.
4. I won't find out the gender. I'm still not sure I'm brave enough to follow through with this. Maybe with baby #3. But I figure baby #2 doesn't matter if it's a girl or boy cause I'll be happy for Lil' J to have a sister close in age, but I'll also be just as happy to have one of each out of the way. If I have two girls I'll be dying to know if #3 is a boy. So it's the perfect opportunity for a surprise baby.
5. Buy cute maternity clothes. I was so excited I didn't need special maternity clothes, but I sorta wish I had. I think getting a few comfy maternity jeans and shirts can be something I have to look forward to with baby #2.
6. Take more bare belly photos. I only have a few from my maternity shoot with Tara and I wasn't even that big. I want to take a photo on the way to the hospital with skin and all.
7. Give birth in water. This isn't mandatory but I think it could be cool. Unless of course I get induced again. If that's the case I want an epidural right away. Which leads us to #8...
8. I'm getting the epidural ASAP. I waited as long as I could before, which was cool. My water broke and I was 5 centimeters dilated, but next time, just give me the drugs when I get there.
9. Give him/her a binky right away. It doesn't have to be habit-forming, but I'd like the kid to like them. Maybe he/she would have more of a chance if I actually gave him/her one from the start. No milk is coming out of the binky and I have yet to meet a baby who prefers a non-food producing binky over eating.
10. Move him/her to their own bed sooner. Like maybe even right away. Ok, maybe not that soon, but I'm not going to wait 5 months next time.

I think of more of these things daily, but I imagine I'll forget most of them by the time it's time for #2.

Baby loves bath time: {Amost} Wordless Wednesday

Hooded Towel c/o Little Lily

All I have to do is rub my fists against my chest (the sign for bath) or say the word "bath" and she laughs and kicks, knowing what's next.

Afterwards we always wrap up in a hooded towel. We have several, some with bears, some with her name but we have two favorites. Our favorite was gifted to us by Cora's mommy, it's special to us. We stop and pray for babies with CHD and their families when we use it. And our second favorite she's wearing above. It's so big, so soft, and so cuddly.

Everyone who comments on this post before Thursday January 20th will be entered to win a hooded towel of their choice from Little Lily.  Towels from this Canadian mama are made with bamboo which is naturally anti-bacterial, ultra-absorbent, eco-friendly and hypoallergenic. You can get up to ONE extra entry by either following Little Lilly on Facebook and tell her you saw her here, or if you're a subscriber/follower of this blog.

Mi familia-Watch out Duggars, I want a BIG one

I am the oldest of five children. I have three beautiful sisters. Heather, who just turned 21, Lauren, who is 13 and Kimberly who is 5. My handsom little brother is Michael, and he's 16.

We didn't all grow up together. In fact, my mom was pregnant with my youngest sister at my wedding (go ahead, bring on the Mormon jokes) so we didn't ever all live under the same roof at the same time.

For most of my childhood it was my younger sister Heather and I. We had some good times but it got oh so much more interesting when Lauren was born, and when my brother joined the family through adoption.

During my maternity leave we were all together for the first time in years. We snapped these pictures and I get a big smile every time I look at them. Having us all together made me realize something...

I want a big family.

I know family size is one of those topics people have on--Oh, say the third date (in Mormon time) and I know we did way back when but that feels like it was more than half a century ago (really it was just nearly 7 years ago)! Things can change can't they? Are opinions on family size changes allowed?

I didn't used to want a big family. I wanted two or three kids. But now I want 10.

Or 6.

But really I'd be happy with 3.

My husband is set on two, which is devastating because I don't think two is enough. What if our next child is another girl? I want to know what it's like to have a son! And what if it's a boy? I want at least one of our kids to have a sibling of the same gender to play with.

I've started to tell my husband I want five kids, hoping we can compromise at three or four. We'll see how that goes.

Expense I think is probably biggest thing that would be standing in our way. But kids don't HAVE to be expensive right?

I always said I'd take it one kid at a time, and right now, I'm already wanting another. I thought 18 months apart would be a good age gap but that would mean I'd need to get knocked up in a couple months and I can tell you for a fact that's NOT happenin.

I'd love for my kids to be close in age so they can grow up together, play together, and see each other at school. I know it's crazy, and we're not ready, but it's in the back of my mind.

Maybe next time I'll randomly get pregnant with quadruplets and we'll be set.

365 Love Letters Week 1

I wasn't sure if I was going to post about this on the main page of my blog or not since I'm worried I won't be able to keep up but they say your goals are easier to keep once you share them right?

One of my friends at my station did a really cool story about a woman in our town who made a 365 things to do in Austin blog, and how she stuck with it all year! It totally inspired me! I wanted to do a 365 *something* but what? A photo a day? Could I keep up with that? A letter to my daughter? Would that be too much? But then @LauraStead suggested a one line note to my daughter, and several friends on my facebook page gave me other similar ideas and it all came together! A one (or two) lined letter within a photo! Just whatever comes to mind that day is what I'm going to share with her. It may be advice, how I feel about her, something cute she did, an accomplishment she's made. At the end of the year I'll print them all out and put them in a book and give it to her when she's older. Maybe on her 18th birthday? I dunno.

My friend Gena helped me with a name suggestion for my little project... Love Letters. So here we go. 365 Love Letters. I'll upload them on this post every day, and post a weekly wrap once a week maybe on Sundays? Either way, you can just click the "365 love letters" tab at the top of my blog to see what I'm posting that day.

Also, I'm noticing this first week I'm putting a lot of effort into making these cute and artistic. I'm sure as the year goes on most of these photos and letters will be created via my iPhone. So let's admire the pretty ones while they last.