A year and a half already?

Dear Sweet Daughter,

The past couple months have flown by like you can't imagine. You are a year and a half now. How has a whole six months already flown by since your birthday? I don't understand it.

Leg warmers: Happy Crawlers, Shoes: Monkey Toes

The biggest change I've seen in you when I look at your past photos is your hair. You can see it's growing and growing as you get older. It's so adorable too and I can't bare to cut it... Ever!

You are just learning so fast. You'll repeat almost anything we say to you, or at least try to. On your own you'll ask up "please" and say "thank you" you'll also say hi and bye... Milk, water, cracker, juice, banana, our names, baby, and other random little things you pick up here and there.

Speaking of babies, you LOVE them. You love your baby dolls, and when we pass one at the store you say "baby" and point. You love the babies at your school and your teachers say you're so kind and gentle--even protective-- of them. This makes me think you are going to be a fabulous big sister. Just like your mommy was of course *wink wink*.

You know almost all of your body parts and point to them when we call them out. Your favorite is belly button. When daddy would call out "toes" you'd point to your nose, so he taught you the difference within minutes and he was totally blown away at your new trick. I tell him all the time you are so smart.

For your year and a half birthday you and I went downtown to Hey Cupcake. We shared a giant strawberry cupcake, but I gave you first dibs.

I'm hoping over the next month to experiment with your hair styles more. We've already been experimenting with homemade clothes and that's been so much fun. You are seriously like my little life-sized doll and I love it. You're a dream come true.

Seriously, I don't know how I got so lucky, and every day I love you more and more! I pick you up and give you hugs and never want to let go. When I ask for a hug you squeeze tightly around my next, and you'll kiss me quickly on my cheek. It feels great knowing you love me back, and seeing you show it. I know you think we are the two coolest people on earth and we appreciate that.

This year is going to be a year of many changes for us. We'll be moving and you'll be starting a new school. Your daddy and I will have new schedules, and we'll have to make you up in a brand new room (hopefully with a bigger closet). It'll be a lot to take in for all of us, but together, we'll make it through.

I thank God every day for blessing us with you. You're so fantastic it's hard to believe you're real. That probably would sound silly to a lot of people but I have a feeling a lot of moms know what I'm talking about. Thank you for brightening my world.

Love,

Mommy

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16 months old and no longer seeming like a baby to me

Dear Daughter:

Can I even call you that? I look at you and your long wet curls dangling past your shoulders in the bath tub and wonder who this big girl is in front of me.

Who is this big girl, who on her own, pointed up to a tree she heard a bird singing from and said "Bir... Bir"?

I know you're my little girl but I can't believe you're already a little girl.

The way you maneuver around the house knowing where everything is, deciding which toys you feel like playing with, and where things go, puts me in awe.

Dress from Adelaide's Boutique; Bow from Lil' Hiccups Boutique

The way you grab Snoop's food scoop, trying to feed him yourself the way we do--And the way you grab the play oven mitt to take food out of the play oven at school (as your teachers tell me) amazes me.

The way you took it upon yourself to turn, lean in, and kiss me goodnight while I swayed you back and forth before bed blew my mind. It's as if you had turned and said "I love you mom" but didn't have a way of really showing me before.

My heart melted to bits, as I'm sure it will again when those words finally come from your mouth.

You are so inquisitive. Who knew how much you were absorbing from just watching your daddy and I. Who knew how smart you'd turn out to be already? You copy little tasks I do and repeat words after me.

Speaking of your daddy, you are so well behaved around him. If he asks you to hand him something you don't want to give me, you do it. If he tries to feed you an unfamiliar food, you'll eat it. With me, you stomp your foot, throw yourself to the ground, or shake your head in my direction. I didn't think this attitude was suppose to start for another year or so but I guess your strong personality is just shining through.

You sometimes get jealous of me giving attention to other children. I'm not sure how much you'll like someday not being the only child. But don't worry, you won't need to worry about that for a while.

I've never been more excited for holidays in my life... Or at least not since I was a little girl myself. It's so fun seeing things through your eyes now, and I'm sure it will only get more fun as you get older. Every day spent with you gets more and more entertaining. Part of me wishes I could freeze time and preserve you as you are, but every new development seems to get better.

I'm a bad influence mom

It was hot. We had been taking pictures for half an hour, and you were in such a good mood. I wanted to make sure you went to bed that night thinking 'I had so much fun with mommy today.' So I loaded you in your car seat and we drove to the next park over. I heard it was cooler, and that there was some water you could play in.

The sun was setting when we got out of the car. If we were lucky we'd only have 15 minutes or so to play before it started to get dark. But I hadn't been there before and I didn't know how to get to the water.

We passed the fountain as we walked in and you leaned, reaching for it, trying to get out of my arms.

I jogged with you around the building and down the stairs but I couldn't see an entrance to the lake.

We ran back up the stairs near the fountain. I took off your pants, and after a quick glance around I let you loose. As I expected, you speed-crawled to the fountain and climbed right in.

At one point a man walked by--I'm assuming someone who works at the park--And said "After everyone goes home, I like to strip down to my underwear and climb in there too." I laughed and thanked my lucky stars he didn't kick us out. You were having so much fun (and I assumed he was kidding).

Rock On Shirt by MoRiginal Designs; Hair Clippie by Moi!

I couldn't help but snap pictures of the good time you were having. At one point my battery died and I brought you half way to the car with me while I grabbed my back up. I sat you down at the edge of the grass thinking you may follow me, instead you raced me back to the fountain. You were in a state of bliss.

But oh man, when it was time to go, you threw a fit. Arched back, jellyfish squirm and all. I felt bad for pulling you away from so much fun but it was past your bed time, and time to go home.

As we reached the car you had calmed down and rested your head on my shoulder. I kissed your wet hair and nose, and told you what I always tell you, time and time again. I love you.

Letting you play in the park fountain probably wasn't my best role-model moment. But it gave us a moment and memory I'll remember, hopefully forever.

I remember when...

My Dear Little Spawnie, My Journey, Little LadyBug, My Sweet Lil' J,

I remember when I planned your existence, or tried to at least.
I remember when your daddy said "ok, let's do this," or something to that effect.
I remember when I saw two lines on the pregnancy test, and I couldn't believe it. My arms were shaking, and I took another test.
I remember when the word "pregnant" lit up across the screen. Your daddy still didn't get it. I had to spell it out.
I remember wondering if you'd stick around, almost every day of my pregnancy.
I remember the first time I knew it was you kicking inside me, and the way your daddy's eyes lit up when he felt it too.
I remember stressing about how you would come into the world, even though I kept telling myself not to.
I remember the blessing your daddy gave me before you were born, and feeling relief.

I remember the moment you were placed in my arms, and saying "Hi baby!" You were so chunky and big, yet so tiny at the same time.
I remember the first time I nursed you, and wondering how long we'd last.
I remember taking you home from the hospital decked out from head to toe, and dressing you up every day since then.

I remember your first smile. Your first laugh in your sleep.

I remember when you first met Snoop. You were best friends instantly. And he rarely leaves your side today.

I remember our first trip together. You slept on the flight and the first 7 after that.
I remember people holding you as a newborn and wondering what they meant by you making their uterus ache. Now I get it.
I remember how calm you were when you were passed around all day. But how extra happy you were by my side.

 

I remember the first time you said "dada" even though I had been saying "mama" to you every day from day one.
And the time you said "dada" on command when your daddy was recording it. I was in disbelief.
When you said "mama" my heart melted. Even though you were whining to be picked up. I remember that.

I remember when your first tooth came in.
And the your first taste of food. You licked the bowl afterward.

 

I remember when you used to cry at night when we'd lay you down to sleep. Now you fall asleep on your own without a hitch.
I remember when you would wake up in the middle of the night, before I went to bed, and I'd bring you downstairs for 2am photoshoots with my phone.
I remember tickle fights, and your belly laughs, they are music to my ears.

I remember agonizing over raising you right, wondering if I was doing it the right way. I still do, but now I'm more confidant.

I remember when you first sat up, rolled over, cruised across the floor--backwards first, and now, your first steps.

I remember these things like it was yesterday, yet it all began a year ago. A year ago today.

You changed my life forever.

I love you.

Happy Birthday

Forever Bliss Photography

One more month as a baby

Dear Daughter,

I can not believe that in less than a month you will be one. I can't believe it. I really can't. In fact, yesterday I was looking to sign us up for a class and it asked for your age group and naturally I chose the "0-6 months" group. I can't believe you are 11 months old. Did I mention I can't believe it?

Boots from Ebay; Owl hat from Mary Sue

You are becoming my new best friend. I know it may seem weird because you are so small, but you're my little buddy. I love bringing you around with me, and showing you off. And I love finding activities we can do together.

What we do the most is take pictures. After I get home from work and feed you, it's like you know it's time to go outside and take pictures. You're not as content inside. You are the best little model and I love showing off the outfits I get for you to family and friends on facebook. In no time you may be picked up by Baby Gap. Who knows.

Dress from Lollipop Moon; bow from London Blue Designs

As far as firsts and developments go, you are starting to speak more. You're like me in that you love to yap away. You can say "dog" which is more like "doh" but sometimes you say "doggie." You also say "Ka ka" when you see a "kitty cat." You are picking up more sign language now so I'm trying to teach you things like "berry" "more" "light" and other things, but mostly you say "milk." If I ever say the word you start signing it. I think it's your favorite word.

You aren't walking yet but you walk along furniture, and you're getting brave and letting go sometimes to test your balance. I've been selfish in not wanting you to walk because I want you to stay my little baby, but at least pictures will be even more fun once you start walking... Unless you start running away from me, which you probably will. You laugh and laugh when you stand up for a few seconds. You know you're growing up and achieving new things.

Tutu from La Bella Creations; Leg warmers from Happy Crawlers; Bow from Chloe and Maude

You have four teeth and more coming in. You love water. I mean LOVE water. We went swimming for the first time this month several times and you never want to get out of the pool. Fittingly, we're having a pool party for your first birthday in a few weeks. I know you'll be so happy to be in the water.

Another thing you love are books. You bring them to me when you want me to read to you, and you'll sit content while I read aloud. Book are definitely still your favorite toy. I'm glad and I hope you keep this hobby and enjoy reading as you grow up.

You love to eat but you are beginning to show interest in certain things. I feel like a horrible mother for letting you consume things like goldfish and pizza crust, but it happens. You love chicken, ham, and your favorite food is berries. I let you try eggs for the first time yesterday and you got sick. I was so sad. You threw up all over me a bunch. But you weren't upset at all, which was good.

Glasses from Clairs; Bow and tutu from London Blue Designs

One thing you're starting to show is a crazy mood swing. I think you get it from your daddy. You will make this crazy growling noise (you've always made one but this is a deeper noise) you sound like you're trying to poop and you arch your back. Your daddy and I were so worried thinking you were sick. I handed you a berry to see if you'd stop and sure enough you did. So it's confirmed. You are pretty much a drama queen. You must get it from your dad. It makes me a little scared to find out what's ahead.

It's fun watching you grow and see you try new things and develop a personality. I like seeing me and your daddy in the things you do, and I can't wait to see what's next.

Eleven months down. I wish we could wrap this up and start all over because these have been the best, and most exciting 11 months of my life. I had no idea having a child could be this fun. People make it sound so scary and hard. While it can be exhausting at times, it's better than I ever could have imagined it being. Now as I sit and watch you I wonder when I can start over and you can have a younger sibling to play with, but I also don't want to rush, and just enjoy this one on one time we get. I stress about the spacing of you and your sibling(s) but keep reminding myself not to worry about it. At least I have you, and everything is going to work out. We are lucky to have each other. And no matter how big you get, in the words of Mariah Carey, you will always be my baby.

I love you,

Mommy

What can I tell you that you don't already know?

My Little Journey,

You definitely have more letters than any other 9 month old I know. What are you going to do with all of these? You have over 95 daily letters from me this year so far, plus 8 letters for each month birthday, about 75 from when you were in my tummy, and another few from before you were even there. You are quite loved. I'm already worried about keeping this up for your future siblings. I'd better get started now so they can have as fun of a collection.

Ralph Lauren Polo Dress via Ebay; Headband c/o Elle Belle's Boutique

I'm already to the point where I am worried I'm going to tell you everything I know before you're a year old. Hopefully I'll keep learning and remember to tell you everything else I know. I'll keep this short to make sure I don't run out of things to say.

We went to your nine month checkup and you didn't need any shots. It was such a relief for me. I was panicking all day looking at your smiling face and worried about you having to be in pain, even though it's only momentary. You came in at 19 pounds 8 ounces, and 28 inches long. Your no longer in the 95th percentile, which makes me a little sad, but I knew this day would eventually come. You're still in the 70th.

You are such a happy, but serious child. You watch everyone so intently like you're figuring them out. Everyone notices that about you when you meet them. People often call you "serious." Once you warm up to them you show off your big beautiful smile though, and will usually try to start a conversation. None of it is in English of course. Well, noting besides "Mama" and "Dada". At least you've learned how to say my name now--Though it's much less commonly spoken.

How are you sleeping? Well, you've got us whipped, let's just say that. You can go down to sleep just fine when we put you in your bed, and sleep in your room by yourself, but when you wake us up in the middle of the night, somehow you end up  in our room. I know this won't last forever though so I'm taking it in strides.

Oilily Spring Dress c/o Jilly Bo Billy; Curled goose feather headband c/o Elle Belle's Boutique

You love to pull up on everything, and crawl everywhere. You're very courageous, and love hanging upside down and swinging high in swings.

It's funny how much I love you. I often wonder if this strong emotion near obsession will go away someday. I hope not. It's kinda fun.

I love you baby girl.

Love,

Mommy

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Happy half birthday baby!

Little Lady,

It's INSANE you've been alive half a year!! What the heck?

People say time flies once you have kids and I'm tellin' ya they ain't lying! I can't believe you're already six months old. I feel like just last week you were born. Now you babble all of the time. Mostly you yell, sing, scream out of excitement and say "dada" and "daddy."

You are a little busy bee. Always watching what we're doing and trying to get involved. You're on my lap as I write this to you right now just watching the words pop up on the screen. From time to time you'll try to mimic me and grab the keyboard but luckily, right now you seem to be content with just watching.

You've been good at sitting up for a few weeks now. You like to play on the floor with your toys. Last night I saw you lunge forward and scoot up on your knees and I thought you were going to start crawling. Good thing you didn't though because I was going to the bathroom and you would have crawled right off the bed. I'm not sure I'm ready for you to start moving yet. I know you are going to be getting into EVERYTHING!

You are beginning to get more independent but you are still preferably social. You'd much rather be in a conversation between your daddy and I than playing off on your own, but if we're not doing much you're happy playing with your toys.

Forever Bliss Photography

You, as I imagined you would, LOVE food. You've tried many different kinds of veggies and you love most of them. You don't like peas, but your daddy and I don't either so we understand. You do like sweet potato and squash.

We went to the doctor today and you are 18.6 pounds now and 27 inches long. 90th percentile for weight and height! Getting your shots were not nearly as bad this time. You only cried for a moment, then I nursed you and sang the alphabet song and you were fine. You LOVE that song. I can sing it any time you're crying and you'll stop and stare at me. Maybe it's because I sang it so much when you were in my belly and during diaper changes when you were small.

We've also started signing with you. Or I have. Your daddy seems to think it's silly. You know what it means when I sign "bath" and you get excited and kick your feet, just like you do when I say it.

I started a project I'm going to give to you when you're older. It's a book I hope to add something to daily this year. I hope I can keep up with it. So far so good!

It has been so fun watching you grow. I'm happy and sad at the same time. I miss you being small but I love the new things you're doing.

Thanks for rocking my world!

Love,

Mommy

4 Months and Growing Strong

Dear Baby,

Boy oh boy little girl, you have developed quite a personality! You know what you want when you want it. So much so that you've grown into two new little nicknames: Diva and Drama Queen. You are so happy and cheerful about 90 percent of time time, but the thing is you LOVE being around people and seeing what's going on. So when it's time for you to go to bed you don't want to. Especially if you know we're staying up. So you get overly tired and cry, until we turn off the lights and pretend we're going to bed too. Sometimes I just give in and go to bed early too.

We used to be able to walk around a store with you in your carrier and you'd fall asleep in a short while, now you stay awake no matter how long it takes, and don't fall asleep until we're in the car.

We've started mommy and me yoga and you love the classes. You are the loudest and most talkative in the class. I think you get that from me. You laugh and smile when you see the other babies, and I can tell you just love being around people.

You've started to grab things. It seems to have happened overnight. It seemed like one day I was telling your daddy we should shake rattles in front of you so you could reach for them, and the next day you were picking things off my plate, trying to put it in your mouth, tossing things off the couch near you, and everything else. You also found your feet and it's the CUTEST thing when you curl up and grab your toes. You haven't put them in your mouth yet--Not on your own at least. I put them in your mouth once to help you. It looked like that was what you wanted. But we haven't done that again since.

I also saw you sucking your thumb today which was so cute.

You don't hate your car seat as much as you used to. If I sing the ABCs to you, you stop crying. That works about 50 percent of the time. You seem to really like my singing, so we do that a lot.

You reached out and pet Snoop this week. I think he appreciated that. I think one day you two will be best friends.

You and your daddy have been enjoying your quality time together. He's doing a good job with you and I miss you two so much when I'm at work. I call home and can hear you laughing in the background and it makes me so sad that I'm missing those moments. Someday it won't be that way. It's nice now though because your daddy helps out SO MUCH. Of course all day while I'm at work, then he gets a break when I get home, then at night before bed be gives me a little break and tries to get you to go to sleep (that's what he's doing right now but you're being a bit stubborn).

Your pediatrician says we can start some solids now, and I was thinking if giving you some rice cereal or oatmeal for your four month birthday today but I didn't get around to it. I'm debating waiting until six months but I'm just so excited to see what you think! You also seem so ready to try. We'll see. Maybe we'll wait another month or so.

You still love mama's milk. Or just mama. Sometimes I'll get home and even though you JUST ATE, you'll want to nurse anyway. It's kind of funny to me but you're sporting those rolls really well so I don't mind. We're still doing well with breastfeeding. WAY better than I thought we'd do. Your Daddy just wishes he had boobs so he could calm you as easily as I can.

This month we started using cloth diapers. There was quiet an adjustment period. I don't think you liked them at first. But now you don't seem to know the difference. In fact, I'd hope you like them a little better since it's softer. You look awfully cute in them, that's for sure! I can't believe we all are actually using and enjoying them. I think we'll stick with it for awhile.

You were the most adorable baby on Halloween. I made part of your Ladybug costume then I found an adorable cowgirl costume I had to get too. I figured it would me more comfortable than the ladybug one on Halloween. So Saturday you were a ladybug and Sunday you were a cowgirl, and we went around the block with your friend dressed up as a cow!
You, your dad and I watched fireworks afterwards. Your first fireworks show! I think you liked it.

Now I can't wait for Christmas. I can't believe it's next month. I said time and time again I wouldn't be one of "those moms" who buys their kids toys they don't need but I'm already thinking about Christmas gifts for you. Of course they'll all be educational *wink*.

These last four months have been the most exciting four months of my life, and every day you're doing something new that just makes me so excited. I can't blink or I'll miss something!

You've been such a treat to have in my life and we're so blessed to have you! I can tell you are just going to be the funniest kid when you get older because you just have a ridiculous amount of personality already. But then again, I think I knew that from the moment I saw you and you lifted your little head up to look at me as if you were saying "So THERE you are!"

Thanks for being the best. Keep it up!

I love you!

Love,

Mommy

Still Happy and Chunky at Three Months

Dear Daughter,

You're three months old now. I can't believe it. I saw some other tiny babies this week at work and you're not seeming so small anymore. You're moving around more, and squirming a lot. You aren't crawling yet but I can tell you're wanting to get around. I'm going to keep holding you as long as I can because I know I'm going to miss that someday soon. Before I know it you'll be running around and I'll need to baby proof our fireplace, nesting tables, and everything else.

You are really developing quite the personality! You still laugh and talk a lot, but now I can tell when you recognize people or things. Especially your daddy. I guess it's good you've been able to spend a lot of one-on-one time with him because I can tell you two really love each other. When I hold you and he's near by and smiles at you you'll flail your arms around, kick and smile at him. You don't really do that for me much, but I know you still recognize me.

When I come home from work you don't smile and laugh until I feed you. Then you just stare at me and smile and it makes me so happy to be back home with you.

We took you out quite a bit together this month. Our first date out together as a family was to Red Robin, and you just sat on my lap and watched us eat. You still drool a lot when we're eating around you, and lately you've been hitting the food from my hands. I can't wait until you're four month birthday cause you'll get to try some yummy dried food cereal. I've already taste tested it for you and it's actually good!

Don't tell anyone but you've already tasted watermelon, yogurt, strawberries, oatmeal, celery, and ice cream. I don't give you spoonfuls or anything but when I'm eating this stuff I'll just put a dab on my finger and let you lick it off. I did hand you the celery and you kinda sucked on it. You seem to like it all. I can't wait to feed you for real, and see what you think of everything!

You still like to play dress-up, but you and I don't get to do it as much. Your daddy does most of the dressing when I have to work. He's done a pretty good job so far. One day he brought you up to my job in your PJs thought but he said he had just given you a bath. I love when you come to visit me during my lunch breaks.

You found and love your hands now. You like to suck on them, but then sometimes I think maybe you stick it too far in your mouth or something cause you cry when you get your whole hand in there.

I bought my first toy for you. I said I wasn't going to get you a bunch of toys but I already gave in and got you some car seat rattles that are black and white, so you like to stare at them. And some bath time alphabet letters. You've started to kick your rattles but I'm not sure if you mean to. I'm still waiting to see you reach for something. I've told daddy he needs to keep practicing shaking things in front of you. I'm not sure what I'm thinking though because one day I'll probably be kicking myself and wishing you would stop grabbing things.

We're in for an adventure this month. We're going to start using cloth diapers. I'm a little scared because I don't like doing anything with poop besides flushing or throwing it away, but I think we may end up liking these better. We'll see. I've been putting them on over your regular diapers to see how they'll look, but I haven't let you go to the bathroom in them yet.

It's been a hard couple of weeks being away from you at work but it's so nice seeing you when I get home, and it's really fun seeing you and your daddy interact.

You're such a good baby, and we love you do much! I love watching you grow.

Love you with all my heart,

Mommy

All of my blog followers or email subscribers who comment on this post before October 17th will be entered to win $75 to CSN stores, where you can buy anything from baby stuff, to home decor, clothes, and more! Good luck!
~Thanks CSN for sponsoring the giveaway.

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Winner of $25 giftcard to Gift Zip: #42 Allisa. Congrats!
Winner of the coddlelife bottle: #26 Kristina. You'll both have 48 hours to respond to claim your prize!

It's Been a Fun Two Months

My Beautiful Daughter,

You're only two months old but already, I'm beginning to feel like you've been in my life forever. My favorite part of the day is when you're in a good mood and smiling. You talk baby talk a lot now too. You especially like to show me how much you can say when I'm on the phone. We've also heard you say "Dada" quite a few times, mostly when you've had enough fun in your swing.

You also know when I'm coming to get you now because you'll fuss a little, but stop once you see me and start smiling and kicking your feet. It's so cute. I can't believe how smart you are!

You've been on three big trips already, and seven flights! That's more than some adults have been on.

Grandma introduced you to Elmo and you love him. I'm not sure how much you can make out on the tv but you smile and giggle at whatever you van make out, and I guess his voice. You don't knnow this yet but I got you a Tickel Me Elmo for Christmas. I hope you'll like it!

One of your favorite things to do is to look at yourself. I record videos of you dancing and you just love seeing yourself move on the computer screen. You smile and laugh at yourself.

You're also starting to notice Snoop a little. But I think you may be allergic to his kisses because he licked your face and it turned all red on that side for an hour or so.

Just as I predicted when you were in my womb, you're very strong. You try to use your legs to stand up and you've been doing that for about a month! You try to climb up the stomach of whoever is holding you. And when we lay you on your back but slightly propped, you stick out your arms and try to sit up using your little tummy muscles. You get mad when you can't move far.

When we flip you over for tummy time you kick your legs around and push yourself up. You like playing on your tummy for awhile. I can't wait until you start grabbing toys and things too. It seems like you're just starting to notice them, but don't know how to grab it yet.

You also love bath time. You love feeling the water and you're sneaky sometimes and try to drink the water.

I think you're really going to like solid food. I'm excited to introduce it to you in a few months. You always look a my food when I eat and you slober a lot. I think you want to taste it.

When we went to the doctor you got your two month vaccines and it was so sad. I felt bad knowing something was about to hurt you, and having to sit there while you cried. You were so happy right before the nurse poked you. Watching you go from smiling to crying made me cry. But I nursed you right after and you were ok.

Before your shots we weighed and measured you and you were about 13.5lbs and 23.5in long. So you're 90th percentile for weight and 95th for height right now. It's so fun watching you grow but it's a little sad too. Sometimes I feel like I already want to get to work on getting you a brother or a sister, but then again I don't think we're quite ready for that yet.

I've had so much fun hanging out with you all day long during my maternity leave. We've had so much fun together. We traveled a lot the first couple of months but these last few weeks we've gotten to relax more and hang out around home.

We have a fun morning routine, you and I. When you start to wake up to eat around 7, so I bring you in bed with me and we go back to sleep until about 9. Then you want to eat again and you finally wake up for the day and are all smiley and happy.

I pump some milk for you and we sing songs and play patty cake. It's probably my favorite part of the day. Then we go downstairs and I let you play in your swing for a little bit while I make breakfast: Strawberry oatmeal and a cinnamon raisin bagel. Then I let you sit with me while I eat and we watch three or four episodes of Say Yes to the Dress on DVR.

I remind you that you don't need a $10,000 Pnina Tornai dress to be happy, and that you should wait a long long time to get married.

It's funny because I really started to get into the show during my labor with you. A Say Yes to the Dress marathon was on TV in the hospital so I watched that after my epidural and until it was time to push.

I've had so much fun spending my time off with you. It's been way more fun than I imagined and it's hard picturing not being with you all day. But I have to remember there's a season for everything and this time in your life it'll be daddy's turn to spend some time with you.

I suppose we'll get used to being apart for a little while. And you'll get to spend some quality time with Daddy for a while. Go easy on him. You and I have things figured out for us but it may take you guys a while to figure out what works for you two.

Being a mommy isn't boring or difficult like I used to worry it would be. It's really really fun.

Thanks for brightening up my world little one!

Love,

Mommy


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41+ Weeks Pregnant: BABY TIME!

Dear Spawnie, Lady Bug, Baby Girl, Lil' J:

There've been so many names I've called you through this journey but soon I'll get to see your little face and call you by your real name.

Everyone always talks about how amazing it is to see your baby for the first time. I guess it's one of those things you can't imagine until it happens. It's hard to picture what it will be like meeting you. Will I feel like I know you? What will I think of you? What will you think of me?

It's funny but I keep jokingly telling people "I hope she's cute," I know you will be but it's just so strange having no idea what you look like. I wish we had done those 4D ultrasounds, but I guess it'll be an even better surprise when we see you.
It's funny thinking I'm going to have you forever and I didn't really have a say in what you're going to be like. See, with Snoop I got to pick him out of the bunch. I picked a calm, cute puppy. With you, well... You chose us! I guess that says something. It probably means we're in for it!

If I had to guess what you'd be like I'd guess you'll come out with squinty eyes, like mine, though I would love it if they were big and round like your daddy's. I kinda hope they are grey because then you have a chance of them staying light-colored and maybe having blue eyes like him!

I think you'll have a nose like mine, and a chin like mine. It already looks like you do from the ultrasounds we saw.

I think you're going to have lots of dark curly hair. At least I hope you do! Your daddy and I both had lots of curly hair when we were born. His was read though. I don't think your hair will be red. That would be crazy!

I think you'll be pretty chubby since you've had so much extra time to bake. Your daddy was over 10 pounds at birth and I was well over 7 pounds and I was quite early. The doctor hasn't made any guesses but if I were to guess I'd say you're going to be about 8lbs 5oz. That's my guess but we'll see. I think you'll be long too... Maybe 22in.

I don't think you're going to cry a ton when you're born, though I kind of hope you do. I hope you like me when you see me. I hope you are a good eater. I really hope you wiggle as much as you do inside me now.

In fact, I'm sure you're ready to come out cause last night you were wiggling SO MUCH. I'm not sure how you have room to wiggle but I'm sure you were trying to bust out of this joint. I even caught you on video!

Last night your dad and I were so excited we could hardly go to sleep. I told him I felt like I was waiting for Christmas and he said "yea me too!" We're both so anxious and excited to meet you. We were actually kinda bored last night.. Something I'm sure we won't be feeling for a long time!!

Please come here safely little one! I can't believe the next letter I write to you you'll be OUT HERE! In the world!

I'm so excited to spend the rest of my life with you little one. We're in for an adventure!

Love you so much little Spawnie!


Anxiously awaiting,


Mommy

40+ Weeks Pregnant

Lil' J,

Well well well little one. Still baking are we? I hope you're having fun in there but I also hope you realize you're playing in a studio apartment when you have a whole mansion that's yours out here. Don't worry, mommy will till be here to cuddle with you when you come out. I'm not going anywhere!

I will say I'm SO grateful we made it to 40 weeks. SO many babies are born early and for a little bit I really worried you would be one of them! But nope, we made it! We made it full term and... Well, and then some I guess. According to my calculations on when you were conceived you're a little older than we had guessed. But just a day older, so no big deal! Today you're 40 weeks and 4 days. Believe it or not the last four days actually went by quicker than I expected.

I did get a little sad this week when you weren't born on one of several days which I thought would be your birthday. I cried a lot and felt silly for crying. Especially since I know it's just a guesstament. I just really thought that by now we'd be here together and you'd be keeping me up at night. The positive side is your daddy and I have had more time to spend alone together before we become a family of 3 (actually 4 including Snoop).

I've gone through a lot of mood swings since I hit the 40 week mark... The day I thought you would be born. But I'm SO grateful for your daddy who's helped me through them all. He's really the best, you are going to love him so much!

(photo of my big 40+ week belly coming soon!)

I've been analyzing almost every symptom wondering if it means your coming... Diarrhea (gross I know but I hear it's a symptom) loosing my mucus plug, nausea, your slowing movements, every leak, cramp, and contraction I'm wondering if "THIS IS IT."

Last night I had a lot of contractions. I was actually having consistent contractions for about 22 hours. For a couple of hours they were just a few minutes apart lasting over a minute long. But I knew it wasn't time to go yet because they weren't very strong.

When I woke up this morning I still was having some contractions but they were more spaced out, and eventually they fizzled down to nothing. I was sad because I thought we were about to finally meet you. Your dad packed his bag and I went to bed hoping my water would break or something but nope. Not yet.

I've been thinking and praying about this a lot but I've decided Saturday is a good deadline to give you. We're going to talk it over with our doctor tomorrow but I'm pretty sure that's the day we'll schedule to be induced if you're not here yet. I'm a little sad that I may not get to experience the whole timing contractions and rushing to the hospital, but your daddy keeps reminding me that we'll be so happy once you're here, and not to get too caught up in the process. Because really, it's in Heavenly Father's and your little hands! Ours too, but we've just got to enjoy the ride, no matter how it takes us to you.
It's so exciting now to think that I'll be meeting you regardless in less than a week!! Just 5 days! You'll be over 41 weeks then, but for now, you're probably about 7 1/2 pounds and 20in long, though we're predicting you're a little bigger.

Tomorrow we'll check the fluid levels around you and make sure you're still doing ok in there so I can go another week. I'm so happy now, knowing it's not much longer until you're here!

Get here safely little one!

Love,

Mommy

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Antsy at 39 Weeks Pregnant

Dear Lil' J,

Today is the day I dreamed you would be born. I'm not sure why the date stuck out in my mind but about a month ago I dreamed you'd be born June 19th... Juneteenth actually. There's lots of parades and festivals going on today to celebrate the occasion of the ending of slavery which was officially marked June 19th 1865. Next year I hope to dress you up and bring you to the parade, I think you'll like it!

I'm so excited to do things with you. I know I'm probably going to be really tired a lot, and there will be days when we won't leave the house for one second, but I hope to take you out on walks with Snoop, and get some fresh air together from time to time. I don't want to force it or anything but I think the sooner we attempt to do things together the less scared I'll be as time goes on.

It's really hard for me not to wonder when you're coming. I'm trying to think of ways to take my mind off of constantly wondering... I'm thinking of exciting things to look forward to BESIDES you coming. Of coruse there's nothing as exciting so this is VERY hard.
I want to go to the temple one more time before you come. But it's an hour and a half away, and your dad is working so I'll have to go alone, or find a friend who can go with me. At least that would be smart... If I end up going into labor sometime that day it probably won't be best to be driving by myself. But I REALLY want to go. But I have a feeling if I DO go alone, you'll decide it's time to show up. If I don't, well of course you'll stay put.

I'd also like to see Toy Story 3. I would bring you once your out but I figure you can still hear it in my womb and we'll both probably enjoy it more this way. Don't worry, I'll buy it when it comes out on DVD so you can see it. Now I just have to convince your daddy to come with me!

The carpet cleaners are coming Wednesday, I guess that's a little something to look forward to.
Snoop's groomed and ready to meet you. I don't know what else to do! Oooh, maybe I'll make another piece of artwork for your room to hang over your door frame. I was going to use vinyl but maybe I'll just draw and paint something myself. I really want to make you a sign that says "Princess: Daughter of a Heavenly King." That'll take time, and be fun! We'll see. I also still need to find you a cute baby memory book. I looked at some at Babies are Us for like and hour yesterday but none of them seemed right to me. I don't know what I'm looking for.

I bought you a cute bathing suit yesterday. You don't have one yet but since we live around so much water, and may do a little splashing around this summer I decided to get you one. I think I may also get us a kiddie pool to go in the backyard. I can just picture it now. You me, and Snoop cooling off in the little plastic pool.
Earlier this week when we went to the doctor we found out I was 20% effaced and 1.5cm dilated. So we've made a little more progress. I have my last scheduled appointment next Tuesday, but we'll most likely have to set up another one in case you decide to come much longer after your projected due date.
You're pretty much done cooking now. Just adding extra fat and stuff. You're still moving a TON (I think you're trying to escape) and squishing my bladder. Thanks.

Well Lil' J. I hope you're having fun in there. I hope you'll like it more out here and decide to show your pretty face sometime between now and Friday.

Love,

Mommy

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